Wednesday, May 2, 2012

IWSG going against the grain


A virtual support group hosted
by Alex J. Cavanaugh
the 1st Wed every month
I know several awesome bloggers--Elana & Alex are two of the best. Both of these bloggers are Super Fabulous and have fantastic work ethics and identifiable methods that contribute to their success.

I want to be as Super Fabulous as them, but I've decided that I can't always have what I want.

And that's okay.

At least, I need it to be okay.

Perhaps I'll go into holy-cow-withdrawal, but I've decided to take a step back from blogging. I won't worry about my blogging schedule. I won't allow myself to feel stressed or like my Whole Career depends on my blogging.

Instead, I'm going to practice being a writer.

I will write and publish new books. I will market and promote my books. I will write more books. I will enjoy reading people's blogs because I will have time for them, time to support and encourage them, which makes me happy. I will be a writing ninja extraordinaire.

I am not Elana nor Alex. I am me. And I've got to be okay with that.

BUT it is scary. I've got a great following here. You might lose interest in my blog. You might be totally right to do so. You might think I am somehow "less than" because I'm not Super Fabulous. So that's my insecurity--that I'm not as awesome as I might like to be. That I am trying to find my limitations, or better demarcate them so I can avoid running into them, and in so doing I might lose your interest or attention.

Those fears may or may not be legitimate--but that's the whole point of the IWSG, right? Most of our insecurities are irrational; though it really is nice to be able to share these silly fears with you!

Do you honor your limitations? Or do you, like I have up until now, constantly push those limits in the hope that you will one day be as Super Fabulous as those bloggers you admire?

AND, the winner of my Thousand Thank You's Giveaway is
Nicole A.!
Thank you for all the wonderful support!


26 comments:

  1. When I first started blogging, it was a frenzy of posting, following, commenting, replying to posts, and panicking whenever I wasn't keeping up. However, I realised that I can't do everything - so I will do my best and hope that's enough. I said this on another blog earlier, but the blogging community is superb, and I don't think they'll leave you just because you have other things to do for a while. :D

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  2. Hi Ali, have just begun the ninja trail and as I do not have twitter,is there some other way to connect with the others?

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  3. I know the pressure. And to always read and follow blogs. I think it'll be fine if you take a break or cut back your blogging schedule.

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  4. I realized a while ago that I don't want to be a super blogger. I want to be a super writer (of fiction). I don't need a huge following. I just want a happy following. (hmmm that makes me sound like a religious cult).

    I'm all for cutting back on the schedule. I've considered dropping to twice a week, but I haven't yet. I'll do it in the summer and then decide. We have to do what works for us. Blogging is supposed to be fun, not a chore. In the end, we still have to write the books. The reason we started blogging in the first place. :)

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  5. Sometimes being Super Fabulous is acknowledging and then accepting where we are at, at a given time. I can't speak for your other followers Ali - all I can say is that I really enjoy someone being themselves and this is reflected in the words they write. There are times when we can expect more of ourselves than we are able to deliver - surely, to continue down this path would be foolishness - to take a deep breath and reassess our priorities and rediscover what really makes us happy must be the 'right' action to take. Reaching a point of balance and contentment sounds like success to me.

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  6. I agree with what you're saying. Both Alex and Elana have big shoes I could never fill. I think realizing you're a writer first, then a blogger is a good step. If you do what makes you happy it will show in the scaled down blogging. I'm cutting back as well to blogging once a week. With the writing schedule I have, it's just too much, and I enjoy writing more so that has to be my priority:)

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  7. I realized really quickly in A to Z that I was not an every day blogger. It was fun for a month, but I can't maintain that pace. I'm all for everyone figuring out what works for them and letting it work for them. Best of luck with everything - I know I'll still be hanging around for whenever you post :)

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  8. Limitations, me? Yeah, I'm wonder woman without the...costume. It's hard to admit your limitations but it makes you a better person. We're not all perfect and I'm pretty sure we'll still be around to support each other. =)

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  9. Oh crap, do I lose points now because I'll be doing something similar? Not backing off too far, just enough to give myself time to write.
    Thanks Ali - you rock!
    And you just need to be the best you, whatever it takes.

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  10. I'm all for cutting back. I have. I'm finally starting to blog more consistently but I don't yet have the time to leave as many comments as I would like. I try but what I can't get to, I try not to let bother me. I can only do what I can, and so that's all you can do too.

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  11. Don't compare yourself to others because it'll drive you nuts! You've gotta do what you can do, and only what you can do. Stepping back and focusing on your writing is kick-butt awesome!! Writing, not networking, is the #1 thing we writers should be doing anyway!

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  12. I've only been blogging once a week becasue I've had these same feelings. It's more important to be a writer rather than a blogger. Good luck and we support you!

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  13. I think focusing on your writing is the best thing you can do! Blogging should be fun, not a chore--sometimes stepping back is the only way to go. Good luck!

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  14. I used to blog every day when I first started and I was starting to feel pressured to post something - anything. I didn't want blogging to be like that. I wanted it to be something fun for me to do so now I no longer pressure myself. I blog about 3 times a week and if that ever becomes too much, I'll cut back again.

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  15. There was a while when I was really dedicated to doing it all - posting, replying, commenting, visiting all the blogs all the time. But it got too overwhelming and tiring. It wasn't FUN anymore. So I'm thinking more of my limitations and doing what I can, remembering to reciprocate but also not to sweat it if I miss someone one week. It's hard because I still worry about not being a cool blogger, but there's other things we have to dedicate ourselves to as well.

    Anyway, I support you! Do what you think is best for you! :)

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  16. This is such a great post because I do have a lot of insecurities about blogging. It feels hard to keep up and do blog hops and be reciprocal. I think I've made my peace with what I'm doing but somedays...I might be a little insecure!

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  17. Kyra ~ Thank you for your kind words. I agree--this blogging community is beyond fabulous!

    Hi C.M.! Yes, you can hang out at the blog, http://www.ninjaswrite where there are weekly ninjachats. We are just starting a different way of doing it, but the plan is to have chats scheduled in the sidebar so you can plan for the month which ones you can participate in. Hopefully, there'll be something for everyone!

    Natalie ~ Yeah, it's just a different approach. It takes a certain amount of dedication to be the type of blogger you and many others are. If I'm ever going to get these next books out, I just can't do it. I need to be a writer first!

    Stina ~ Yes, Yes and YES! Thank you! *high fives*

    Accidental Writer ~ I love how you put that--you did it beautifully! While I was reading your comment I realized that it's what my mission has been all along--to be authentic, to follow my heart and to live in the moment. I can't live in the moment if I'm denying who I am (a WRITER first, blogger second (or third, fourth or tenth, lol)). Thank you so much!

    Marta ~ Why was I ever insecure about this decision? It seems there are many of you who feel the same! Thank you for telling me. :)

    LOL, thank you Tasha! I rocked last year's A-Z. But that was last year. THIS year has been a whole different beast!

    Thank you E! (And I bet secretly you really ARE Wonder Woman!)

    Alex ~ No you don't lose points, you GAIN them in my eyes! Because THIS I totally get. Plus ... I love your books so I'm all for whatever you need to do to crank out some more!

    Nicole ~ You are so right! ((hugs)) I bet it's VERY demanding to be a mom to an infant AND be putting out books!

    Laura ~ You've got that right! My readers don't care if I'm blogging, they want to know when the next book will be out! LOL

    J ~ Yes! Thank you and good luck to you, too!

    ((hugs)) Meredith! Thank you!

    Mama J ~ Great attitude! Thank you!

    Krispy ~ When I read your words, "I still worry about not being a cool blogger" I totally expected you to follow up with "but I can be super cool in tons of other ways!" That's what I think you SHOULD have said, anyway, because you ARE super cool. You don't need a blog for that. ;) Thanks for being my bloggy pal!

    Johanna ~ If you're anything at all like me, it comes and goes, right? Sometimes I feel totally okay with not "doing it all" . . . other times, not so much. But we've got awesome support here, don't we? Thanks so much for visiting and sharing your insecurities with me, lol!

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  18. I had trouble with this during the A-Z Challenge. April involved other projects (though I still did not get much writing done . . . blargh) and it was hard to find where the right blogging zone was. I think I've found it, though.

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  19. I've found when I try to be me instead of being somebody else, I am much more interesting :) Great advice!

    Allison (Geek Banter)

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  20. You are super fabulous, no matter how often you blog. You're awesome and you need to do whatever to make yourself feel awesome(because I promise, you ARE :D ). If that means backing off from blogging and focusing more on writing, then that's what you do. (Besides, I'm all for whatever gets another Desi book out sooner :p )

    We all have insecurities and none of them are ever silly. I recently discovered my limitations and had to back off from things I was doing (not sleeping enough was my biggest problem). It took awhile for me to realize my limits, but now that I have, I've been working on honoring them.

    (((HUGS)))

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  21. You're an amazing person, writer, and karate chop Queen. Do what you gotta do. =D

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  22. You get to be you-whatever that happens to be. I'm still figuring out what my writer self is, so I understand the dilema, esp. around so many awesome-super writing, super blogging, tweeting, tublr people. Your knowing that you need to change and having the courage to do it-that's a strength. Being nervous about it, that's human and why IWSG is so good for us:)

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  23. When it comes to blogging, I've definitely got my opinions. Mostly because I spent a good two years screwing my own blog up. But in the end, I found myself through those screw ups and what I wanted from myself. I learned that I didn't want "scheduled" posts or "5x a week" or "promote, promote, promote!" (Granted, I don't have promotion on the horizon right now...)

    I discovered that I just wanted to connect with people. I wanted to be myself and stop worrying so much. I wanted to ignore to numbers of followers and instead find friends. And that's had it's consequences. I've lost a lot of followers. I have quieter traffic. But I'm happier than I've ever been with my blog and I feel like I connect better with people. I blog when I want. I read blogs when I want. And when I don't have the time, I just let it slide. It's not that I don't care. It's just that I've found a balance that works for me. It's not for everyone. But it is for me. :)

    So from my perspective, you do what you have to, ali. There's not a place on this earth that I wouldn't follow you to. You'll never be rid of me, I hate to say. ;)

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  24. I could have written this post, Ali. I adore and am in awe of Elana. And Alex really is all kinds of awesome. Would I love to be more like Elana? Yes, yes, and yes! Do I have it in me? I don't know. I continue to do the best I can do, though, and decided to be satisfied with that. :)

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  25. Elana and Alex are both awesome in their own ways. And so are you. It's taken me a long time to realize trying to measure myself to others' talents / achievements is moot because it's like comparing apples and oranges. All you can do is the best you can with what you can control and know that you've done everything in your power to keep up your awesomeness. Hugs to you, my dear. You are one of the most awesome people I know!

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  26. I think you are awesome, ali! I've also had to stop obsessing about blogging - schedules, commenting, following and all that jazz. I can only do what I can do and I have to be okay with it - hence why I'm about a month late commenting on this post - but better late than never as the saying goes :)

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Welcome Fellow Ninjas! Gimme your best palm strike, karate chop, side kick or roundhouse. I'm ready!